Last Impressions Leaving First Impressions

I'm back with more sage advice.  Ready?  Keep reading.  Go on.
Okay, here it is. 


Do not neglect the back of your apartment door, it might be the last thing a visitor sees as they leave.  You hadn't thought of that had you?  That's why I'm here.  I told you it would be sage advice.

Let's jump right to an example you also might not have thought of.  Make a peephole cover.  No one needs to see into your apartment and you don't have to give them the means to do so.  You don't really need to see out either.  You'll do better to shout out "WHO IS IT?" after someone rings.  Make sure you yell loud and in a tone that lets them know they are really annoying you.  You may be watching Rachel Ray but they should think you're doing something important.  If they want to come in tell them you aren't the landlord and can't let people onto the property like that.

You want to keep an exclusive air about your interior.  Those who are good enough to get in should be confident that many others are not worthy of the privilege.  If you intend to let them inside it's always good to ask some fake qualifying questions anyway.  Once they do get in they'll feel like you're doing them a favor and your interior will be hallowed ground.  So much of design has nothing to do with the tangibles.  Seeing means very little sometimes.

Here's a peephole cover.  Nothing too special.  But when you surround this shape and texture with complimentary elements like a horseshoe, antlers and some scratchy art you've got a solid last impression.

Getting back to the exclusive entrance policy, if you don't have a good angry or loud voice let some stickers back you up.  I recommend letting people know you have a dog or weapons of some variety.  The picture below does both, though if they don't speak Italian they may take you for a dog hunter, which, though a different message, will put some fear into them all the same.

And to keep Taylor Swift fans (who are believe-it-or-not unafraid of both dogs and guns) away try this one:

That's all for today.  Remember that an insolent first impression paves the way to a good first last impression.

More Plants

Shrubberies

I am often struck by the incidental banal things of life.  I'm sure we all are to some degree, but I'm wondering about the role these qualities have within purposeful design.  True design always has them, but the standard design fare seems to have gone another direction (in many varied ways that won't be covered here, but they and the alternatives are all over this blog so read through the archives).  How can it be that substandard design has intentionally excluded itself from the very ingredients which I think make design good?  The first part of that answer is in the title of this post.  I'm so sorry, I'm boring myself with this topic.  Sometimes I try too hard.

Here's a mistake:

And some icicles in formation:

And I'll leave you with some dirty laundry:

WQ&P

What does WQ&P mean?  Well it means Wall Quilt and Pillows, what else?  So if you didn't know, now you know.  And if you were blind, now you will see (keep scrolling).  No thanks necessary.

I intend but keep forgetting to write about cats and other house pets.  Yes that means I'll say something about dogs too even thought they are inferior to cats, and for that matter to rabbits (so funny), goats (they produce milk), goldfish (you can't beat the color) and lots of other worthy but less talked about pets.
Now that I've riled myself (and all 400 thousand million dog owners in the neighborhood) and prematurely started the pets post I already said would come at a later time, I'll let this topic rest for awhile (but I will continue to tease you with images of things other than cats that happen to have cats (yeah I'm still dissing dogs) in them).

Put your family on the wall

Personal pictures are a great way to decorate your walls.  Don't use pictures from magazines of people you don't know or who don't know you.  You may have done that when you were 12 but you're to old for that now (if you are still 12 then you have my enthusiastic permission to cover your walls in Taylor Swift).

Great design is a synthesis of form and content.  So when talking about putting up pictures of your family you have the content part covered.  They're your family, there's not much more to it than that.  Let's move on to form.  Here's where it gets touchy.  Pictures of your family might be frightful or embarrassing, but do not fear, I have some ideas.

Start by assessing each individual's physical strengths and weaknesses.  In a picture, people don't have to be what they are but can be whatever you want them to be.  It's a common practice in the fashion world to alter photos.  Get over your weak illusions of authenticity before you read any further.  It's very easy to give people hats and crazy glasses and to change their clothes and hair.  If they are hopeless for looking good they can at least look gallant, exotic or enigmatic.  And if even those qualities are hopeless, adding background elements is a great way to distract from the actual subject of the photo.  Throw in a vampire elephant or make it a birthday party with decorations which overwhelm the scene.  Sometimes a lame pose can be a great one when recontextualized.  So for example, take your boring Dendrochronologist uncle who insists on leaning against a tree every time he is photographed and turn him into a superhero with a brightly colored argyle sweater.  Let people know you may have a little bit of superhero blood flowing through your body while also hiding your uncle's huge forehead behind a mask. 

If you are short on ideas, take one idea and apply it throughout to create a themed wall.  Give them all handle-bar mustaches (yes, women too- don't ever go only halfway on an idea) or make them all superheroes.  Name the wall if you want.  Arrange it family tree style.  Don't forget your precious pets, they're family too.

Make copies and try a number of variations.  In the example photo here, you can see that the photos are all black & white, which unites the arrangement (it's also cheap to make copies), and the color is added manually.

Create a family you will be proud of.  Let people know where you like to imagine you came from.
Have fun.  An ugly family is not an insurmountable task.

And don't be afraid to include a picture of yourself.  You know you want to, so go for it.